Your feelings matter
You don’t need to validate your feelings to anyone
Your feelings matter
You are entitled to feel the way you do
Don’t let anyone tell you different
Your feelings matter
Emotions serve an important purpose and shouldn’t be ignored.
For example, feeling angry, afraid, or sad tells you that something’s wrong.
You don’t want to miss these crucial pieces of information because they can help you to take care of yourself and make decisions to keep yourself safe.
Feelings aren’t right or wrong.
It has been my own experience when I have felt down and saddened.
Never base your sense of self-worth on the approval of other people.
I have made that mistake a few times.
Avoid doing things for the approval of others to make yourself feel good or like you matter.
It will provide you the illusion of mattering, but that will all go away when you’re no longer useful.
Your worth is not tied up on what you can contribute. Your worth is because you are a human being deserving of basic respect and consideration.
People that may have hurt you in the past most likely will not allow you to be vulnerable and let your emotions out.
That doesn’t mean you have to let go of your feelings and place them away like they never happened.
Though you may feel like you don’t matter right now, you’re not alone.
Many people struggle to find people to be around and a place to fit into the world.
Part of this is the evolution of our society. Church used to be a common social denominator where people would regularly gather and socialize.
That would help fill that hole of loneliness and community that is tied to feeling like you matter.
Today, with many denominations, and society targeting beliefs, people do not attend church like they used to.
Many don’t carry health insurance to provide themselves with therapy, they lose friends throughout the years and that leads to losing shoulders to lean on.
Find yourself a safe outlet to speak your emotions and lean on someone who can be there for you.
So, what can we do?
To have our feelings be validated and help ourselves heal from past trauma or disappointing feelings?
Embrace your feelings, show them off! If you’re sad, let someone know you’re sad.
If you like to write, write that person a letter or an email.
The good news is that these feelings can be redirected or shaped into a healthier perspective about your place in the world.
If you’re reading this and you would like guidance on how to be a better listener, to someone you may have hurt here are a few helpful steps:
- Listen Empathically
- Give your full attention
- If you’re distracted, let the other person know and ask to talk at a later time
- Invite them to open up. If you suspect someone wants to talk about something but isn’t comfortable initiating the conversation, try asking a simple question like, “You seem upset, can I help with anything”
- Be observant
- Don’t rush there time and feelings
- Have compassion
- If your wrong, own it and apologize
Remember, we are all human and we all have emotions. Some carry it differently and regardless of the situation everyone is entitled to feel a certain way even if you don’t feel the same.
This post was written by Lauren K., and published by Convenient Counseling Services.
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