Should you pay attention to what your kids are doing on their phone?
Many parents say yes.
Parents should check their child’s phone use and monitor their internet activity.
Above all else, it is the fundamental duty of any responsible parents to protect their children from potential harm.
In today’s world checking a child’s phone is a massive part of that responsibility.
But what if you don’t, does that make you an irresponsible parent?
Should you read your child’s texts? It depends.
In thegreatschool.org stated this;
John Duffy, a family psychologist based in Chicago, says that when safety is an issue, absolutely.
“There will be times when looking at your child’s phone is okay.”
Duffy, author of Parenting the New Teen in the Age of Anxiety, says that if your child is putting themselves or others in harm’s way, and if the only way to keep them safe is to look, then by all means look.
But, he adds, with this strong caveat:
Establish the rules with your child in advance and make sure they know that if you’re concerned for his safety, you reserve the right to look.
“The mistake we make as parents is that we aren’t clear in advance that sometimes we will look at their phones.”
And when the phone is new, he says, some supervision is a good idea.
Duffy likens the first few months that a child has their phone to driving with a learner’s permit, a period when the new driver is required to have a mindful adult by their side, helping them learn to navigate potential dangers.
“I never expect a kid to understand the implications and the reach of what they post [on social media],” says Duffy, who as a family therapist regularly sees kids “who have a lingering
belief it works like a note in class, like nobody is going to see this and it’s temporary and not permanent.”
But, all of this is up for debate.
You can argue the fact that at a specific age and maturity level you should teach your children specific responsibility for having a phone.
I don’t check my teen’s phone because by invading their privacy you set them up to feel the need to sneak and lie, and break the trust that you have built.
By trusting them and letting them have their privacy you encourage a sense of safety and honesty.
They’ll come to you when they need advice or a friend needs help.
However, be on the lookout for signs your teen’s phone use is interfering with their behavior, grades, social life, or overall everyday functioning.
There are many warning signs you may want to restrict your teen’s phone privileges.
It’s important to create clear smartphone rules that outline your expectations as a parent.
You can try..
- Time restrictions, decreasing screen time to limit usage at night and early mornings.
- Parental controls, allowing the parents to turn on and off specific privacy locks for the phone to be more safe; such as location and text message reading on.
- Adding a location finder so you can see where your child is when they are not home.
- Teenagers are entering a stage where they are trying to move away from their parents and gain some independence, according to Empowering Parents.
They likely have their own phones, their own social media accounts and their own lives.
Phones are a way of life.
Unfortunately, electronics are the way of the future.
Parents continue to set rules and give responsibility.
Encourage our children of today to be the best they can be!
This post was written by Lauren K., and published by Convenient Counseling Services.
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